So I tell people at work that I am an unofficial soccer step mom, and they totally get it. They know exactly what that means without any explanation. They understand immediately the balance that I am trying to hold outside of work.
Six months ago if you were to ask me if I'd still be living in Idaho, working in Washington, in love with a man ten years older than me, who drinks and smokes and loves me, and going to 4th - 6th grade soccer games, I would probably laugh and say no way.
Michael and I only started dating about 5 months ago, exactly two days after I defended my master's thesis we had our first "official" date and suddenly became a couple all at once. It was an exciting time, and then things quickly - and I mean quickly - evolved. In a matter of days, maybe two weeks at the most, he invited me over to meet his kids - Katie who is 15 and Mikey who is 10. And within a week of "meeting the kids," he invited me to have dinner with them. Then one thing led to another and I started sleeping over.
Now, I leave my 8 - 5 job at the neighboring university early every Tuesday to take Mikey to his soccer games, and rush home from work on Thursdays for soccer practice.
It's an interesting experience. I hesitate when other parents ask me who my "kid is." I know what they mean to ask - which kid am I there for? But I hesitate still. Technically he's not my kid, not even my step-kid legally. But I try to treat him as if he is my kid; I bring him to his games like he's my kid; I make him dinner like he's my kid; I ask him about his homework like he's my kid. At first I didn't though. I warmed up to this. At first I was dead silent around them, I didn't really know what to say. I thought if I acted too much like a "grown-up" then they wouldn't like me, but if I acted too "cool" then would it get awkward for them, especially Katie, I am ten years younger than their dad, when does it start getting weird?
Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah, soccer.
So at the first game, one of the mom's asked if I was Michael's wife. I hesitated for a minute and then corrected her. "Girlfriend. I'm his girlfriend." Though I secretly liked the way that wife sounded.
At the next soccer game, another mom asked if I was Mikey's mom. I hesitated for a minute, trying to think of how to answer. "No, I'm Michael's girlfriend." (Similar to how I answered today, Mikey's dad's girlfriend.)
I wonder what stopped me from saying yes, I am his wife, and his mom. They would have believed me and Michael and Mikey wouldn't have found out. Would they? What would have happened if I did say yes and they did find out? I don't know, and don't really want to know. I'm okay with just secretly liking the way they both sound.
The Life of the unofficial soccer step mom...
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